I recently had a conversation with someone about the difference between a process and a journey. As I review the journey of my life I am coming the awareness that its all about finding and nurturing my authentic voice or Trusage. This is my deep intuition, my heart's core, the ground of my being, the source of my soul. My journey was started out of pain, trauma, and loss. But rather then feel deeply into my fears, anger, and sadness I hid behind socialized expectations that have been more of a hindrance than a help.
My wife sent me a book that arrested my attention it is entitled; The Voice: Overcome Negative Self-Talk and Discover Your inner Wisdom written by Brian Alman and Stephen Montgomery. It's about the mind-body-spirit connection of transforming unbearable pain into livable disappointment. The authors cite examples of how physical pain can be healed from the inside out.
For the past several months I have been on a journey of training for triathlons and races. As I write this entry, I am aware of moderate pain coursing through my body as a result of a grueling workout, thanks to my running Angel. While running at 7.5 mph at an incline of 6 on route to turning "purple" she kept saying breathe engage your core. What a powerful metaphor for life! When pain is kicking your butt, breathe and engage your core!! Let me, explain.
The "negative" stress of life is caused from experiences in the past that project fear into the future robbing a person of the Power of Now. Repressed emotions like fear, sadness, anger, guilt, shame, anxiety, etc. are carried and buried in the body. Have you noticed on the Biggest Loser how a lot of weight issues are directly tied to some emotional, psychological pain of the past? I am coming to understand that physical pain or maladaptive behavior is a manifestation of deeper emotional or spiritual pain. "First things happen on the inside, and then they happen on the outside".
During my training as a CPE student I was bragging one day to my Supervisor about all the "stuff" I was doing in my life. After I finished she looked me in the eye and said: "I hear what you are saying about your success but, I noticed you gained a significant amount of weight, how is the landscape of your soul?" Her question stopped me in my tracks and forced me to examine my "innerscape".
The inner journey and writing this blog is helping me re-frame and focus transforming the "process" of weight loss and triathlon training into the journey of weight loss and triathlon training.
Heartfelt thanks to you for reading and sharing this experience with me.
Peace & Blessings on Your Journey
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Friday, February 7, 2014
Dealing with the "Chop"
I shall never forget the first time I swam in open water, in Lake Michigan. The water was cold and choppy. I was being tossed around like a rag doll. Although I could stand up at any moment I, found myself struggling against the current trying to remain calm and relaxed. The more I struggled the more anxious I became. As I began to hyperventilate I found myself swallowing more water than I was I taking in air. In those extremely nerve racking moments, that seems to last an eternity, my survival was in jeopardy!! I began to pray: "Please Lord, don't let me drown and be swept away to Davy Jones' locker!!"
Thank God my prayers were answered !!! I am alive to tell the story!!
Life can get very choppy and turbulent. Non stop pressures and demands can make you feel confused and overwhelmed. Unable to tell up from down, we can get swept away in the tumultuous emotions of the daily rat race. Profoundly chaotic emotions like fear, sadness, and anger, have a way of taking over our minds driving us into the depths of despair and alienation.
I am learning how to deal with the "Chop" of life. When in I find myself in troubling currents, I stop and let go of over struggling. I sense what you are thinking, "Are you freaking kidding, ME!! Stop struggling?!! Really?!! Are your serious??" "Nonsense!" "I have to keep pushing and striving, life is about struggle and sacrifice" "The harder I work and struggle the more I will obtain."
I feel you!! I hear you!! But let me ask you; "How is that working for you?"
The idea of unending struggle and heroic fight is deep within our psychic DNA. The truth is that the "Chop" of life can be like quicksand, Chinese finger trap, or a deep hole. The more you struggle, fight and dig , the more you sink, become stuck, and get in over your head unable to climb out.
Am I saying that we should never struggle and strive? Of course, not! Life is all about struggling and striving. Where I've gotten lost and bogged down, is when I think, that all there is to life is the "Chop."
Yes, life is choppy and turbulent. Life does have moments of struggle where the future is uncertain and the results of striving seem fruitless. However, the tension filled "Chop" of life can be embraced and transcended. The Psalmist writes: "Weeping may endure for a night but, joy comes in the morning." The question is: "What do you in the mean time when morning is a long way off , and you are in the "Chop" of life, being tossed back and forth by anger, sadness and fear right now?"
For me, I am learning to trust the Presence of the Divine within me and all around me. By staying in touch with myself I, experience the Presence who provides peace that surpasses all understanding. This empowers me to go with the flow.
When I was in Lake Michigan I had wetsuit that surround me, held me up, when I felt like I would sink. Once I trusted the buoyancy of being held and supported, I found myself floating on top of the water going with the flow of the current and swimming smarter not harder.
As I swam, supported from within and without I was able to acknowledge fear, anger, and sadness but still remain focused on experiencing gratitude, hope, and peace in spite of frustration and which transformed the "chop" into still waters.
Peace & Blessings On Your Journey
Thank God my prayers were answered !!! I am alive to tell the story!!
Life can get very choppy and turbulent. Non stop pressures and demands can make you feel confused and overwhelmed. Unable to tell up from down, we can get swept away in the tumultuous emotions of the daily rat race. Profoundly chaotic emotions like fear, sadness, and anger, have a way of taking over our minds driving us into the depths of despair and alienation.
I am learning how to deal with the "Chop" of life. When in I find myself in troubling currents, I stop and let go of over struggling. I sense what you are thinking, "Are you freaking kidding, ME!! Stop struggling?!! Really?!! Are your serious??" "Nonsense!" "I have to keep pushing and striving, life is about struggle and sacrifice" "The harder I work and struggle the more I will obtain."
I feel you!! I hear you!! But let me ask you; "How is that working for you?"
The idea of unending struggle and heroic fight is deep within our psychic DNA. The truth is that the "Chop" of life can be like quicksand, Chinese finger trap, or a deep hole. The more you struggle, fight and dig , the more you sink, become stuck, and get in over your head unable to climb out.
Am I saying that we should never struggle and strive? Of course, not! Life is all about struggling and striving. Where I've gotten lost and bogged down, is when I think, that all there is to life is the "Chop."
Yes, life is choppy and turbulent. Life does have moments of struggle where the future is uncertain and the results of striving seem fruitless. However, the tension filled "Chop" of life can be embraced and transcended. The Psalmist writes: "Weeping may endure for a night but, joy comes in the morning." The question is: "What do you in the mean time when morning is a long way off , and you are in the "Chop" of life, being tossed back and forth by anger, sadness and fear right now?"
For me, I am learning to trust the Presence of the Divine within me and all around me. By staying in touch with myself I, experience the Presence who provides peace that surpasses all understanding. This empowers me to go with the flow.
When I was in Lake Michigan I had wetsuit that surround me, held me up, when I felt like I would sink. Once I trusted the buoyancy of being held and supported, I found myself floating on top of the water going with the flow of the current and swimming smarter not harder.
As I swam, supported from within and without I was able to acknowledge fear, anger, and sadness but still remain focused on experiencing gratitude, hope, and peace in spite of frustration and which transformed the "chop" into still waters.
Peace & Blessings On Your Journey
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